Valentine’s Day is supposed to be the most romantic day of the year. But is it really? How romantic is a day that everyone feels compelled to do the same thing? People buy the same gifts, the same cards, visit the same restaurants, and generally experience the same version of the day. What is special about that?
If you don’t know the origins of Valentines (which I didn’t, I just knew there was a saint involved at some point) here’s a quick summary of where Valentine’s Day even came from. The Roman Festival Lupercalia is thought to have been an inspiration for Valentine’s Day; it was celebrated on the 15th of February and was a celebration to purify the city while promoting health and fertility. You’ll also be pleased to know that there is lot less animal sacrifice and violence in our modern Valentine’s Day celebrations. The name comes from a martyred priest (or three, apparently the Romans liked to execute priests called Valentine on the 14th). Valentine was a 3rd century Catholic priest who was imprisoned and then executed, but it is said that he sent a letter to the daughter of his jailer signed with the words “love from your Valentine” before his execution. Valentine’s Day was then further popularised as a romantic holiday by Chaucer and Shakespeare. Chaucer was the first to suggest that Valentine’s Day was for lovers in his 14th century poem “The Parliament of Fowls,” in which “Seynt Valentynes day” is the day birds choose their mates. Shakespeare referenced Valentine’s Day as a day for romance in A Midsummer’s Night’s Dream, as well as in Hamlet where he perpetuates the superstition that people who meet on Valentines Day are more likely to get married.
Since its origin, Valentine’s Day (much like Christmas) has been co-opted into a commercial holiday and has become far less personal that it perhaps has been in the past, with it becoming more about conforming to the holiday than celebrating it. Valentine’s Day is a billion-pound industry; in 2024, it was estimated that £1.5 billion was spent on Valentine’s Day in the UK alone. An estimated 61% of people in the UK will celebrate Valentines Day this year, and reports have found that the average spend on Valentine’s Day per person is £52 – this includes cards, gifts, and meals out. Interestingly, trends are showing that fewer people are celebrating year on year, but that they are spending more on their celebrations.
Last year, the most popular – or rather most purchased – gifts for Valentine’s Day were flowers and chocolate. It was the same in 2023, and 2022… have we lost any creativity or are these the only options for gifts at this point? In 2024 over 220 million red roses were sold on Valentine’s Day in the UK alone, and as lovely as it is to receive flowers as a gift, I just keep imagining a queue of people waiting in line, all clutching a bouquet of red roses and feeling like they are making an original choice. Valentine’s Day shouldn’t have to be expensive; you don’t need to go out for an expensive meal, and you don’t need to buy an expensive gift. What you should do is think of something personal that your partner would appreciate.
Talking of originality, did you know that Valentine’s Day is the 3rd most popular day for proposals? This follows Christmas Day and New Years Eve. In fact, in a survey of 2000 people, 21% said that they got engaged on Valentine’s Day. To put this into perspective, you are 77 times more likely to receive a proposal on Valentine’s Day than on almost any other day of the year.
Despite my cynicism, Valentine’s Day does provide a boost for hospitality. Around 25% of people in the UK prefer to celebrate the day with a meal out. On Valentines Day 2023, the number of transactions in hospitality venues such as restaurants, bars and pubs across the UK increased by 22%. This is mutually beneficial: you get to enjoy a meal out, and the restaurant gets a boost. Interestingly, people give better tips or are more likely to tip on Valentines Day, but I would credit this to people wanting to impress their date over generosity. On other hand, many restaurants are not equipped to serve that many people, and often do not have the space nor the staff to cope with this increase in patrons. This can result in tables being crammed in and longer wait times, which overall doesn’t make for a great experience.
So where does that leave us? Valentine’s day can be a lovely celebration and a time to take a moment for yourselves – but only if you try. Otherwise, you’re just another person buying red roses on Valentine’s Day.
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